Christmas comes but once a year,
But when it does we parents fear;
The kids have got it sussed you see,
It's time to fleece both you and me.
...
One March Monday morning
A dark dismal day,
The snow slowly sleeting,
We wending our way.
...
The sun is always shining
In Weston-Super-Mare;
At least it always has been
Whenever we've been there.
...
You could, and you should,
If you did, did you 'dould '
Is this sentence confusing your brain?
If it's not then it's clear
...
I'm fascinated by the way
Our language comes unstuck,
When all the rules of spelling
Look as though they've run amok.
...
'Mankind has descended from monkeys'
I heard on the telly last week;
The scientists say that it's certain,
I say that I think they've a cheek.
...
Get you purses out ladies
And rattle your cash
Get along to the ticket-booth
Go have a bash;
...
I miss you my friend
I wish you were here
It's dreary without you
It's weary, unclear.
...
The older a man gets
The more he gathers about himself
Those things that remind him
Of his youth
...