A Poet's Confession 5 (Self Reflections) Poem by Compton Wright

As I walk this earth with pure strength and determination trying to follow an oath
That I made in my young pre-teen years as I made an undying promise that I'll be
Strong for my friends, family, my lover and finally myself as you see how that list expands
An never ending list that continues to grow because I think everyone deserve to be happy
Stretching my mind for more wisdom but also carried more responsibilities overtime as
Describe as a guardian angel towards my family and friends because of my constant care
Willing to jump into battle and protect for those who are pinned down by their problems
Never pushed away anyone who needed my assistance, a friend or sadly a scapegoat as
Remembered the reputation that I hold now…I was known as the strongest person they know
That's why they come to me for their fears, anger, and even their inner demons but yet I feel
That I inherited their demons while living with my own that I wished would leave me be one day

Some days I looked within myself if there is enough strength for me to go on with this life I lived
As lost the fear of death…don't care if my life was taken by another human being but what scares me
I probably thank him for putting out my pure misery as I feel like there is nothing here for me but
I know some people are quick to tell me that I shouldn't feel that way and there is more for me
Pleading for me to never think that my life is done and finished and that I need my soul to rest
But I want others to laugh and smile while they bring my body into my coffin for my funeral
Why would it matter if my death was announced? I rather want you all just forget about all of
My actions…expect that the advice I gave and the smiles I created by my personality and poetry

Every single night my thoughts lead me into the pure definition of 'over-thinking' over and over again
About Life and Death, Love and Friendship and finally Doubts and Depression…hated how I never get
Any sleep because of constant thoughts swirl into a sleepless session of unanswered questions but
Mostly about all of the mistakes I ever made and how I dealt with them so poorly or incorrectly…
Wishing I can bring out the truth from my everlasting lies that I told for years and years now but
Reality strikes my face with understanding no one can never handle the cold truth as if ever told
They'll changed and transform into something more vile and bitter than before as the pain will grow
The word trust will have less meaning towards one another and their persona will be unsociable to me

But I must confess that even when I try to figure that what my reflection within the mirror day by day
Am I an intelligent man with huge dreams, success and potentials that will make any person jealous of?
Or Am I a failure who is wasting his time trying to get his life to together and should be dead and gone…
I continue to ask myself this every day when I wake until the sun hides its appearance and moon shows
As I let my beautiful readers to see this poet's confession once again to let himself reflect his persona,
His thoughts and his constant struggle between strive and doubt constantly trying to succeed in life
No matter how many people doubt, hate or ask for vengeance from the devil to let me fail in my steps
I'll continue to write and prove you all that this ambition will never die and same goes for my poetic soul