Big Girl Poem by lost lindsey

I smile through the blood
And laugh with every hit
Smell the booze on his breath
Won't be the last time yet 
Got scabs on his forearms 
And anger in his eyes 
Throws me around and
My cracked lips smeared
With his hate coming down in 
Ruby red droplets
He grabs me and hates me 
But I already forgave him
For tomorrows bruises
Long as I don't lose him 
Big as a rock 
Only thing that anchors me
But he is lost in his own sea
I see him drowning in his eyes 
Confusion sweeping over him 
Lays himself down on the couch 
And I flee to our room 
And land on the bed
Feeling skin puff up
Here and and there
Feelings forgotten with each
Band aid,
Will I ever be loved?  
I wipe the blood from my mouth
an spit it out, grinning
Big and laughing,
No, no one could ever love
A bloody skinny fool
Like me.