Commissioning Of A Crime Poem by Daniel Ionita

IWay back in nineteen eighty-seven,
decrepit and rained to the bone
I turned for a minute to whisper:
Hey Fifi! Leave my hamster alone!

My uncle, who harnessed his rodent
from his death, to the day he was born,
said: "Fifi, that cunning Delilah,
she won't leave my hamster alone! "

I tried to incite her with plenty of money
I sold both my kidney and stone.
But Fifi, you wouldn't believe it!
has spent it on hamsters, alone.

I screamed, and I cried for that hamster
I learned how to sing baritone
to cover its squeals when I knifed it
so that Fifi would leave it alone!

I think I might run to the tropics.
Get lost in the furthest unknown.
But should you see Fifi, just kill her
for that is the only way she would actually leave that bloody hamster alone.