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Fell down to dust
On the dull earth
As the world blacked out
Before my helpless sight
Sight awakened, senses acute
Hovering over the groundless halls
Jerking my body, sudden but swift
Numb and sore
Looked in four paths
Clouds puffed up beyond imagination
Sun glowed up blinding my eyes
As mother nature was summoned to me
Aghast by my sight
In awe I stood still
Through my aching limbs I endured
I lifted my palm
And touched the face of God
Anders Lim
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Click here to write your comments about this poem (Death by Anders Lim)
Old Amsterdam (5/17/2007 8:48:00 AM)
Great! I like the style of your poetry! Can we make friends? I'm Chinese too. |
Grace Tan (2/8/2007 9:27:00 AM)
Aaa... not bad! ! It is a poem with a nice touch. You are able to make it flow and the concept is unique.
Although so, it can be improved by one little thing- I have just commented to another writer before this too- punctuation. Altough you added a few commas, fullstops seem to make no appearance throughout the stanzas. I am positive that if you put 'em in, it will sound greater than before! ! So, give it a try, ne? |
Read all 2 comments >>
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