Desiring Salvation Poem by Andy Brookes

Shall I shed my skin peel the layers of years
contempt, derision, confusion.

slip out the camouflage burst and split,
a transformation from alpha to beta.
become like the chameleon, alter rearrange,
be another, so that you can see that I change for you
shall I, shall I become the sad reflection
an unwritten sheet to be rearranged, edited.

redirection, deflection, deception.
would the pain in my eyes be enough
or the remedy be too exotic,
like a bird with borrowed feathers
would you love me then, would you, could you.

but no this is not who or what I am
so take me in this old wrinkled suit
tired sagging face that has seen too much hate
and not, as it turns out, enough love.

but then you never did understand.
so though I rise the cliched phoenix from the ashes
I rise the same but changed.

Realising sometimes you have to let go,
and by letting to keep hold of the things you are.