Euphemisms Or Goofy-Isms Poem by Stanley Cooper

Some very common euphemisms
Are nothing more than goofy-isms
Those who once bought “used cars”
Now purchase “pre-owned” stars

“Civilian casualties” can now be bandaged
By reporting them as collaterally damaged
We hate to think that a friend has “died”
He’s “passed on” we more easily take in stride

We hesitate to refer to someone as “short and fat”
“Vertically and horizontally challenged” is where he’s at
Don’t use the word “kill”, it might traumatize
We’re more comfortable with saying he’s been “marginalized

We don’t “fire” an employee, we “let him go”
Keeping us on a guiltless plateau
These are examples of just some euphemisms
Which I’m sure you’ll agree are just goofy-isms