I Don'T Matter Poem by Shilesha Johnson

i don't matter
and why should i
i feel like inside
im dyin
and i keep cryin
cause im tryin
and you wont let me
cause i know that i hurt the only one i truly love
and it hurts ME
because
thats not what i does
and though that may not be correct english
it aint something i would do
and it hurts me
because it was something that i did do to you
and i feel like everything is only going to get worse
and i don't want it to
but the truth hurts
the truth is that you don't want nothing to do with me
and i know that you do still care
but youd rather me not be here
and it hurts because i never thought that with you these feelings would occur
but they have and i wont be able to find another
the hardest part is that you told everyone
something i never would have done
why would you want to put me out there
i know that you were mad
and you just didn't care
but id never do that to you
and i know i hurt you
but id never tell your business
especially with the people you dont trust
and you told my business to people that you wouldn't even tell your own
and i just want to go home
home is where everyhting was secured
i was yours
you didn't regret me
you and i were happy
when things were great
i want to go home
home is back to the days
when i would look into your eyes
and every hurt and pain inside
would dissapear
i cant go home
cause you don't even want to come near
and now im stuck in this place
where you want to erase
me from your life
i know you feel that way deep inside
you make me feel worse like i never did anything right
and it hurts me because even though you had lots of flaws
you were the most perfect thing in my life