I Will Keep Going Poem by Angela Bontle Ditumiso

I guess I have always known
I'm more than my thoughts
More than their words

People told me
I'm worthless,
I will never amount to anything
They told me
I'm a waste of space,
A burden
My mind agreed with them
Kept echoing these words
Over and over
Into each moment
I made an excuse for it
Called this depression
And maybe it was
Because after all
Not only did the thoughts escalate
But after a while
My mind told me,
Kill yourself
I'm glad I didn't listen

I was always heavy
With their burdening words
I was always sad
Always in doubt
But never did I stop trying
Never did I give up

I was always flogged by my thoughts
Always in chains,
Don't ask me why it took me
This long to fly
I've been victimized
By my own mind
I'm an ex prisoner
Of what should've led me to freedom
My mind created a prison within
The prison of this world

I knew I'll never measure up
To anybody's expectations
So I didn't even try
To aim for the target
I told myself
They can keep their opinions
And rightfully and peacefully so
Besides, everybody close
To my heart
Bets for me
I don't even know why
I listened to strangers on
The sidelines
I will keep going my way
I'll keep being
Until my mind whispers,
I think I was wrong about you