Longing For What? Poem by Abrar Ajaz Wani

I am not any closest of thy,
Distanced by chains of time
Drowned in worries of veil
See I'm longing for what?
At real color, have not shape
Lonely like sky full of stars
With a gown of restless
A mad-man who wander,
Street-to-street unintentionally
So like I'm longing for what?
I have never clue what I am?
Some say a mad-poet, he is
The other say, a machine lover
Might you think, Texture-less painting?
But if look onto inside my eyes
I wish someone could just see,
And shall find unsettled pain,
A broken world of hopes, too
Some twisted threads of faith
With darkness all around
I can't solve my confusions
I'm numb, lost in thought
Every time new face of mine
Appears before me in mirror
I'm longing for what?