Reckless Admirations Poem by HIMAvinandan D'Costa-Roy I

The unwanted flood me
Her pains, only is what i see
Corrupted faulterers deem discrepancy
Unknown unstable, this entire valency
Why'd she be so far, happy or contented
Yet when togetherness depletes
This lie I resented, from beginnings
For us it would be beautiful! She heeds
Where my endings? Say, end?
Which moment would we then together blend?

Truth, have we any? Anymore?
As we let each other beat
Each other, until, it's gone, furthermore
Into the rings, into unnoticed deceit?
Ha! Where's that which I have still due?
Is it true? Under the Earth, it flew?
Silly, is it not? All this for what?
Is any more harm left yet?
I know she'd understand, yet
I cannot
Prove
Her shadows I long for,
Not her to stoop! !

A slight glance in the sunbeams
The light of the moment gleams
For once, any pleasure drifted
To serendipity of sarcasm
At the events that occurred before
To the tiniest of reason
I was broken already, from core
Why? The sky's had rolled in
Downpours that streamed my path
Lost in silence, engulfed by sin
I had tried enough to smile that morning
My love, she alone kept me trying

This heart of mine, is much like me, determined
Across the edges, seldom, carefully lined
I let it lose to that girl, then guaging me
I missed, what demanded fee
Just to know her more, I felt urgent
Amidst tastes, choice and decent
I didn't want her to go
And I await, for misled, she is so.

Dear beautiful, you can keep ur peace
Don't mind me, I'd only be around
I'm just scared, of fear, this moment, of losing this
For it goes by, not again to be found
Il know what is yet to be known, if so its needed
However much folly, and filth, i fight
This good feeling however receded
If you're there, just let me know, you just might
I'm keeping well ur sweet smile, in my memory
You'd never probably know anyway,
Amidst the good and bad symphony
💝