Stared Into Nothing Poem by Andrus Cassian

Dismiss it, erase it from memory
let it wash away like a river and a waterfall
but the question still hanging in the air
like the air going into a balloon until it pops: Why
There is no announcement, just stoic silence, speechless
a moment for a sneak attack and another to provoke a reaction
The face of evil, the face of disgust, the face bearing all the hate I can muster
the menace who plotted destruction, the menace who threatened to kill the coward to cause immense grief appeared like a ghost yet tangible
but nothing occurred, nothing happened
not a fight, not a war of words, not a fiery explosion
just a heavy weighted stare and a long exhaled breath signifying a stalemate
The rage, justified rage and hate admittingly raised a red flag
but with a shake of the head, it was solemnly dismissed
like I turned out to be the better man, false
The will to unleash a barrage of heavy weighted fists and words like boulders
still consumes the muscles clenching but yet...
would it really matter in the end, an epiphany? possibly
though the issue is like a hurricane lying in wait
to lay seige to the happiness Anastasia desperately wants me to obtain
one I slowly want to sink in...
Anastasia...the touch of her lips still feels as if I've fallen into slumber upon a cloud...
The fight in me, drained like water in a sink
The struggle to remain a tank, subsided; I am but a man once again
Threat level diminished, nonexistent; transition though undeserved is well...whatever...whatever...
She was worth the melee, at least it's what I tell myself
She was worth the wounds, at least it's what my healing heart concurs
The reason, is she to why I am the shadow in the spotlight
unable to claim victor nor defeated