Still Poem by Eman Awad

I wonder why am i still here?
holding on to old and gone memories.
And why alive still is my tear?
wide awake just to see him in reveries.
I do this all the day,
because at night i can't sleep.
From my dreams he runs away,
i fall into the darkness so deep.
Here still and i love him still,
i can't get him out of my mind.
Even though i scream that i'll,
forget all that and leave it behind.
But both me and my heart know,
we can never forget who we love.
The one who made our stars glow,
the one we flied with, the skies above.
The one who had only pain to render,
and he had us both to die and give up.
The only one for we did surrender,
and all of our tears, for him they drop.
Why inside of me i die?
and then smile again if i knew.
That no more he comes to cry,
when they tell me, (he isn't missing you) .
What am i to feel this way?
i die for me but i'm happy for him.
I don't know how to get by the day,
since i saw his eyes without me in them.
Can i scream my pain out,
so, can i scream those words?
I'll tell all about,
painless and beautiful worlds.
And even those aren't the same,
they have who i love no more in them.
Who are we to scream at and to blame?
and to ask, how will we get over him?
And still we are standing,
and still we are here..
We are coping and understanding,
living with an eternal tear.
But still we are,
and still he's far, still...