Ace Of Black Hearts (04/17/1984 / Homa Lousiana)
The Anger I Need(Revised)
I never seen this coming
Like an atom bomb blowing up in my face
I'm in complete utter shock
Hurt in places I totally forgot
Buried deep for such a long time
Yet it seems like yesterday
To feel like a wounded child
What I want is not what I feel
I'm out to destroy myself
Every inch of me needs to be clean
Wash away the sins
My stomach burns
The flames bring me to my knees
It has become twisted
An ability to the read the signs
It should be mine
And I hate myself for it
A lack of observation
Can it destroy the mind?
The greed only makes me want to cut myself
To watch the skin bleed
I must suffer like no other
For the lazy, stupid, egotistical, ignorant minds of our time
Am I weak for the pain I feel?
Am I weak for the lust to kill?
Am I weak for my lack of understanding?
Relating to my experiences so sick
That sometimes they hurt so much to admit
Denial hits, as I want to be pure
Just so I can feel what's real
Obliterated, and turned inside out
I want to shout
But not a single words comes out
An empty mouth
Anger locked away
And I can't find that key
I so desperately need
To show I actually care about this
When it is so wrong where is my anger?
I need it
Most would kill over less
Oh such beautiful public humiliation
But yet I'm still numb
So indifferent to everyone and everything
I think I lost part of my personality
Was it by hiding it?
Was it by denying it?
Always using a piece of paper for what I feel with in.
Has it destroyed part of me?
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