The Mystery Shopper Poem by Phil Soar

The mystery shopper walked in the store
Asking assistants where could she find more
Deep in her list were the grocery oddities
That no-one should ask for without some apologies

But she was just testing the stores helpful staff
And pushing her trolley like someone who's daft
A mystery shopper with time on her hands
Looking for products and real obscure brands

When she left and completed her home questionnaire
She ticked all the boxes, her comments were 'FAIR'
Except for the one that asked if she was impressed
She didn't tick that, she'd forgotten to dress

The mystery shopper walked into that store
With nothing but nakedness from her head to the floor
It's amazing that management didn't show her the door
But most of them felt she was there to ignore