(07-18-1989 / Arkansas)

This Life Of Mine

Thought about it all day long
Wanted to so bad but couldn't get the courage or the strength
To pick up that knife to mark on me one more time
But I didn't I haven't seen scars from a knife in a long while

Felt like something was holding me back
All my courage just went away
And all my strength just turned into weakness
How I wanted to and needed too just to feel alive

Spending most my days wondering my life away
Wishing to be whole when all I ever wanted was a dream come true
Behind my eyes lye broken dreams
Dreams that I know I won't ever fix

But that's over and done or is it
I'm lost and confused about everything
Trying to figure out where I stand
And I'm on a emotional roller coaster and can't get off

So alone and filled with pain from head to toe
Deep down my soul is screaming
And my heart is bruised
My whole body is broken everywhere

Sometimes I wish I could go to the land of no return
Maybe then I wouldn't hurt near as bad
Maybe then I wouldn't be filled with pain or broken all over the place
Wish I knew where to begin with this life but I can't even find the starting line

March 9,2008

Submitted: Monday, March 10, 2008

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