Time To Forget(A Suicidal Cry) Poem by Guarded Heart

I never thought these desires would come again
I never even imagined the desire to die would win
Against the urge to live
I don't want to fade to the spector i once was
But it's time to give it all up
I dread awaking, i know the pain is waiting
I know i'm nothing, with out your trust what can i be?
Daddy, please forgive me, try to understand me
I wish i could tell you how i'm feeling, everything i'm doing
Hold me tightly, i want to stop breathing
Leave this world behind me
After all who's going to miss me?
I'm sure yoo can replace me
I'm tired of all the lies and deciet
I wish you could just be happy for me
I'll take this dose and waste away
And as the pain builds up inside me
The more i know i'll need
Somebody to love me, somebody to hold me
But i know where you'll be
Locked away in some distant fantasy
Where you never beat me, always loved me
As the lightning storm rages within me
I've lost all desire to live, to breathe
Let someone else have my dreams
I'm to tired to fight it
Hell is anxiously waiting for me
To welcome me, to burn me
But right now i'm home, a different form of hell
Locked in my room, this cell, a prison, my tomb
No longer can i pretend that i'm so innocent
My eyes are dry, no tearsa left to cry
Only because i know that no matter how hard i try
I'll never win this fight
You want to kill the inner me, you say i'm too pretty
Keep calling me a freak, you beat at my creativity
God how i drea mto be free
This kife was meant to be a gift, but you never wanted me
Now i'm not sure if i want to be
It's time to forget i ever lived
And its time to remember that i always knew
That i was never good enough for you