Welcome To My Life Poem by Amber Millar

You never understand that I'm hurting,
No one does,
No one knows that I'm screaming inside,
No one knows that inside I go over and over it in my head,
If only I could actually cry,
It would feel like a release,
But, alas, I cannot,
I do not want to burden other people with my problems,
But they eat me up,
I scream into my pillow,
And screw up my eyes against the tears,
Then I put on a big, cheesey fake smile,
And force a laugh,
Try to please everyone,
But it always goes so so so wrong,
I've messed up so many times,
I apologise and apologise,
But i forget what i'm apologising for,
I need to let it out,
My eyes start to sting,
But I won't let it happen,
So many times i've stopped it now,
It is just my only reflex,
I will not cry,
I cannot cry,
So if you ever feel like you're hurting inside,
Or you just want to cry out,
Than you will understand how I feel all the time,
But for you it will get better,
Someone will come and make it all alright again,
Not for me though,
I just have to grin and bear it,
Welcome to my life,
I hope you enjoy your stay...