You Will Not Poem by Mary Angela Douglas

in my twenties I started quite often to see flashes of golden light

somehow I knew indicated the presence of angels

I did not need an eye test, it was no hallucination

no mirage

because simultaneously I felt I was surrounded

with a serenity I cannot really express in words

I would like to say also shortly after this I

found the book by William James called

The Varieties of Religious Experience

this was in the autumn initially

then in Spring I found the Paradiso

in the Ciardi translation.

nothing is an accident; sometimes the light

from other worlds breaks through into ours

how strange it is, how truly deranged

that often people who see such things

would be advised to consult medical attention

as if having the gift of seeing something

that cannot be explained

by the practical is an illness.

and I learned the hard way

keep your mouth shut

about the visionary.the illuminating.

but I still know what I saw.

I truly did see.

and you will not take it from me.

on this or any day.

construe it, how you may.

mary angela douglas 3 december 2022; 7 february 2023