Stacy Dinmaa

In a moment of rare vulnerability bottled up with foils of scripted carriages heavy enough with damages yet pleading to be awaken by peace, In that moment I knew I could imagine! I could wish! I could dream!
Forgetting this feeling, forgetting this one sweet fatal play shaking up to re-open the walls of the BROKEN! I knew it was not a dream!
Sore, fragile and warm again I returned, ready to be sprinkled on lilies, ready to be blown and grown. Running past the ripping pieces of the unknown, I wish I was told!
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Never thought life would play further by dancing from the edges,
It's a long run too close from falling from the benches.
Up or down who knows the reasons for the guesses.
Lost in disguise too hot to pledge in dresses.
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It is what it is only if it was what it should be,
Then it could be that I won't have to walk in this shoes where my foot hurts, where my heart groans, where it hurts.
And truth be told if it were up to me, then I won't be stuck in a state where chaos daily cuts through me or emotions constantly messing with me!
If it were meant to be, then I won't be caught with ropes and cuffs empty in rots. Feelings and thoughts, chanting and scorns.
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If it was meant to be then sketches won't be torn and my heart won't be born.
Love won't be pawn for regret to begun.
Fate won't be wrong when pain pierces forth.
It is what it is, only if it was what it could be!
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I wish i knew better,
Wish i could predict,
Fear to disappoint myself not anyone,
Fear to lose those firm admiration,
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Veils of Stacy
'It's a puzzle,
There are pieces,
There are also peaches'
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Life took me to places I never knew I could be,
Feelings I never knew I could feel.
Yes I'm young but old.
Old like snow on a stone.
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Time and Time take me back to the drill of those wet, bruised, deep, bitter, angry, choked, cruel emotions!
take me please….
Blur enough to cast imaginary broken pieces of an aftermath!
Driven to drain fresh memories of a sad bitter truth of why's and moments undefined! So lame it could be denied….
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A man once made promises to me but never kept any so please forgive me if I don't believe your words.
Forgive me if you think I'm too sensitive.
Forgive me if I'm hard to deal with.
I'd rather choose me than lose myself again.
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What did I do to deserve it?
I'm not sure I'll ever stop asking this question.
I gave you all my love right from the very first day I knew the definition of love!
Where did I go wrong?
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How wrong can wrong be? Breaking free from a bound that was wrong…
Giving so much for a love so wrong…..
Loosing it all in a place like wrong…
Hating myself so much for being wrong!
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For a moment you convinced me this was Love.
For a moment you convinced me my Pain was valid.
For a moment you convinced me I wasn't Enough.
For a moment, I was
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I think it's time to let it go.
Let go of the doubt,
Let go of the fear,
Let go of the insecurities,
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It's so hard to deal with life. To heal and Un-heal. To break and cry with nothing to hold on to.
Day's like this it's hard to learn and un-learn and realize you're nothing close to being smart. Day's like this I realize I lived my life in a bubble called unreality. Day's like this I got to find out I'm powerless and alone regardless of the people on my side. I realize my parents are right. Day's like this I realize they have always been right about life. I feel sorry for ever doubting them. Day's like this I respect and love them more because days like this I realize I'm dumb about this journey called Life…
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I think it's time to let it go. Let go of the doubt, let go of the fear, let go of the insecurities, let go of the uncertainties, I think it's time. Time to recognize the depth of the love I give. Time to accept the innocence of my heart. It's time to set it free, it's time to let it feel, it's time to let it make mistakes. Time to let her see the spark of satisfaction her deep affection brings. It's time to embrace the freedom to be seen, heard, valued, appreciated and loved. It's time to refuse to be lost in the darkness that made me gone. It's time to explore the tenderness of my heart and give it to the one it beats for but what if? She thought…what if? ?
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Why are you a story in thousand stories?
Why are you the impossibility in everyone's reality?
Is anything new? I'm curious,
Pain bought a safe place here,
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