Oh how graced I must be to walk the hallowed halls
of that thing you call a heart.
A cold draft follows me out, for even the air is stale
and needs an escape.
Who knew one could contain so deep a chasm in one's chest.
A canyon for the viewing of passerby.
So hollow, the rhythmic beating resounds in ears miles away.
A drum of warning, come no closer,
for you might fall in. In fact, you may never hit bottom.
A free fall that comes with a price.
How proud you must be, for you are certainly one of a kind.
Great metaphors and imagery througout really allow the meaning to shine through. Captivating beginning. Clever ending. Nice sarcasm & sharp wit ;) Thanks for sharing.
I like the rhythm and imagery in this piece. But I disagree...not one of a kind. Hollowhearts: population, of many.
Wow someone felt the bite on that one! A powerful piece Argentine; a certainty to this person's heartlessness. Beautiful
Whoa, this is really good. I love how you compare the heart to a canyon and: So hollow, the rhythmic beating resounds in ears miles away. So good. So very good. I've never thought of using such a hyperbole. I often think of the heart as another world or land, but... my, well that was quite excellent indeed. In a rather short poem you've covered a lot concerning a feeling I'm (and I'm sure many other people) are all too familiar with. Rubbish hearts... but good. Very good.
A sweet bitter poem. The cadence is good and touches the heart and underlying emotion shook me!
A short but wonderful poem. So hollow, the rhythmic beating resounds in ears miles away. Well said.
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
Intense... Emotions displayed, raw, naked. Too bad his heart is so unfeeling that... your words will never touch him... at least, they touched me... Great Ink Argentine...Great Ink.; -) -Kelly.