Allow Me To Be Myself Poem by Nii Ayi Solomon

Why must I have a make-up of a fool?
Leaving me with horrors of my past
The past that mirror a fractured heart
And a sinking dream
Driving me to a hollow of absent-mindedness

Why must I feast with a toothless ghost?
When its life has vanished into nothingness
With no hope for today
And maybe tomorrow
But filled with regrets of yesterday

Why must I sit in the council of bamboozles?
And allow them to fill me with nonsense
Teaching me how to live for today
With no plan for tomorrow
Burying tomorrow in the grave
They call ‘it will take care of itself'

Why must I give my love to someone?
Who does not appreciate beautiful things?
Locking my happiness in the cells of a union
That will not see the day light.

Why must believe an idea
Even if it does not dish out my needs
Only praying it works one day
Trusting the gods will perform magic

Why must I be pressured to marry?
When I have not found my missing rib
All in the name of pleasing society
Putting out of my mind, they will be absent
When its problems start slapping me in the face

Why must I pretend to be happy?
When I know my heart has a deep cut
And I cannot beam with smiles
Knowing well that my sensitivity
Has been locked up in cells of my recent past
And my feelings are no more animate

Why must I pretend to be some else?
Why must I pretend to be you?
When you know I cannot be you
Why must I make you happy?
When you know making you happy
Makes me sad
Allow me to find the light
That penetrates all darkness
Because all I want to be is the best me.
(*Sat*27*Oct*2012)