An Pagbutas / Letting Go Poem by Jaime Jesus Borlagdan

Pagnabobotod na
sa paoro-otrong bagay
bakong minawot mo man
na magtukaw
sa tampi kan dagat
isuka an gabos na piot
sa kahewasan
hangoson an kahewasan
muya mong kagan ki dagat
an saimong daghan.

A, pero an pagbutas
garo pagluwas
halis sa nasusulong harong
haloy na tinipon
pasiring sa maawot
na haloy pigraraot.

Paghinampang mo an dagat
digdi sa tampi kan kinaban
tatalikudan mo an mailaw na karnabal
kun sain saro kang sirkerong
nagtutulay sa alambre oru-aldaw.
Pano na su mga palakpak?
Pano na su ngaran
na may patenteng nagkikimat-kimat?
Pero nabobotod ka na sa paoro-otrong bagay
muya mong kagan ki dagat
an saimong daghan.

Kun siring, dangogon mo muna ako
mantang pigpupusak ko an sadiri
sa basud
dangogon mo muna ako
mantang pigpupugulan an ikog ko
kan baybay.

Dangogon mo ako
ta arog ako kaini minagibong kahewasan.
An kada pagbalik sa hinalean
garo enot na pag-abot sa padumanan
an kada paghale garo may babayaan
na dai na babalikan.
An arog kaan na relihiyon
kaipuhan mo munang dangogon.
Bago mo ako mawoton
dangogon mo muna
kun kaya mong ipalis
an dawa sarong tagdo ko
sa saimong daghan
buda pahukulon ining
arog kaini.

English:

Drowning already
on repeating things
didn't you also long
to sit
along the edge of the sea
and vomit all the tightness
to the void
inhale the vastness—
you want to put a sea
in your chest.

Ah, but letting go
is like moving out
of a burning house
long compiled
toward the grass
long despised.

If you'd face the sea
here at the edge of the world
you would be turning your back to the bright carnival
where you are an acrobat
walking the wire everyday.
What will be of the applause?
What will be of the name
with the blinking lights?
But you're already drowning on repeating things
you want to put a sea
in your chest.

If so hear me first
while I dash myself
to the sand
hear me first
while my tail is grabbed
by the shore.

Listen to me
for this is how I create vastness.
Every return to origin
is like the first arrival to a destination
every departure is like leaving someone
without coming back.
That kind of religion
should be heard first.
Before you desire me
first of all listen
whether you can pour
even a dropp of me
to your chest
and make it wave
like this.