Corey And Drugs Controled Me Poem by sammie kelley

Ever since I can remember
Drugs have controlled my life
I've tried them all
Never too picky was I...
It never occurred to me I was an addict
Not until Corey entered my life
Before Corey I did not let drugs control my life
I always put my kids first
It did not matter about nothing else...
Corey introduced me to so much new
Made me realize I was an addict
He helped feed my addiction more and more
And now I see he was the worst thing that entered my life
But back then I was to blinded by love
I did not want to see the truth
Still to this day I question myself
'Why did I ever listen to him when it came to my kids? '
He had never been a parent
He was not the one responsible for these kids...
But I listened when he said they were big enough to stay home
Even though I KNEW better
Just the same I went along...
Before I met Corey
Never would I have let them stay alone
I did not care if they did not want to go
Cause I knew what could happen
I knew it was wrong...
Before Corey I had my life on the right track
Then after Corey my life took a nose dive down
It just goes to show
We were not good together right from the start
Cause yes I loved my kids
But I started putting him first
And decided to do what he wanted
Not listening to my gut
Knowing it was not right
But also it was the drugs
I was letting Corey and the drugs control me and my life
Neither one did I want to give up...
So instead I gave up on my kids
After they were taken away
So much guilt and blame I have
My babies I no longer had...
Even after them I kept it up
Just harder and stronger drugs
I continued to let Drugs and Corey control my life
It took losing my kids, catching felonies, jail, rehab
And I know there's so much more
To finally see after 7 years and losing everything
that ever meant anything to me
Neither Corey or the drugs do I really need...
And now here I am
Waiting to see what my future now holds
Whats in store for me
It has to be better
I think God knows I can't handle much more
I know my future is going to be better
Cause the Lord has promised me sooo

May 21,2014