Crazy Balls Poem by Laura arwen

For my family
I'm never enough
I am always
obliged to stay
at home because
I am forbidden
to leave
Sometimes my life
is so boring
and monotonous that
no hobby can
distract me
I'm tired to
be weak
I always feel
useless and paranoid
It is no
longer time to
be sensitive
I'm crazy thinking
of being able
to change my
social position
Sometimes I'm exhausted
by too much
thinking
I hate not
having to rest
well
I want to
sleep all day
and all night
I don't want
to risk to
lose myself and
my world
Often I feel
very empty
When I walk
I find a
minimum part
of inner peace
I like to
smell the scent
of the rain
I'm indifferent to
the refined beauty
Sometimes I want
an interminable isolation
Honestly I'm not
interested in many
things
I need to
find the right
equilibrium