Dancing With The Ratings Poem by Ramona Thompson

Fact or fiction? What do you believe?

So far so good
All appears to be going according to plan
Took us almost forever to figure out a way to pull this one off
Thought for a while there that we might not be able to
More times than we can count our lady almost backed out
Thank heavens we finally paid J's ex enough to finally say yes

The Bachelor break-up idea came off without a hitch
Our viewing public never knew or even seemed to suspect a thing
And for that we count ourselves lucky, so damn lucky
Anything could have gone wrong
Anyone could have broken down and spilled the beans
But now because they did't we can go full force ahead
To make M the star she has always deserved to be

It may be a little underhanded
To lie this way to everyone involved
To fix a simple tv show just so that a friend's friend can win
Just so a small town nothing can go on
To become a big town something
The people will vote, but it won't matter
Because if we have our way
This year's winner of Dancing With the Stars has already been chosen

I'm sending you this letter in the greatest of confidences
No other eyes must see this
I've done my part
Now, J, you must do yours
The day after the finale here is what you are to do
Call our winner up and tell her you want her back
After that, we will arrange your first public reunion interview
Trust me
The plan is 100 percent foolproof

Talk to you again in a few weeks,

The Eagle