Darkness Poem by Emma Good

How to communicate my own anxiety?
My chest feels as if a giant were sitting on top of me.
The tightness suffocates not only my breathing but my thoughts.
My brain feels jumbled and all I can produce are teary sad eyes.
But who can know my sadness?
All that resonates within are thoughts of unworthyness.
Why am I so easily discarted?
How can I be pushed out over a misunderstanding?
I must hold no worth to the one I put first.
My throat feels heavy as I try to breathe and hold back my tears.
If he knew of my weaknesses what would he think?
Surely he wouldn't understand.
Why would I think he even cared?
I am far from alright.
I have my own issues that I carry.
But I carry them alone and I weep in silence.
He must not understand my sadness.
I barely understand it myself.
Tonight I will hold myself to slumber.
Tonight I will choke back tears.
Tonight I will question my worth.
All I wish is to be told how valuable I am.
I wish to be held instead of pushed away.
I long to be loved from deep inside.