Flying Or Drowning? Poem by jane wongso Suhardjo

I always want you the most
when you are turning back
I always want black
when you are white
Or maybe I want grey

Or I would never figure out what I want
Or maybe I want nothing

Tell me what are we doing
Are we drowning or flying?

Cause you keep on bouncing back
Then I kept getting slaps on face

I need to believe that we are
(not) having a happy ending

I used to told you to stop,
stop burdening me
with your so-called love.

Maybe I just need to stop myself
to keep bouncing back and forth

Please, tell me!
Are we drowning or flying?
Flying or drowning?
?
but no matter what
our feet are not on the ground