Friday, 3 Pm Poem by Jade Leven

I guess you really heard me that time
when you asked if I was alright
I guess you could see it in my eyes
the cold and the fear of a starless night

I guess you really cared that time
when you told me to tell you everything
but these wrought iron gates to my fragile heart
refused to let you know anything

the truth is, it's not just one thing
that was bothering me that day
we're closer, yet farther apart than ever
but neither of us will say

we know it, and we believe it
but it scares us, so we try not to
do we change it or do we leave it?
I can never decide, so it's all up to you

I don't even know what to tell you
do I run, do I hide, do I stay right here?
I don't know if we're getting back to
the way it was for over a year

I guess you want to understand this time
because you just can't let it go
that there's something I wouldn't necessarily tell you
that there's something you may never know

I guess you want to protect me this time
like I've tried my best to protect you
it makes me feel better, yet worse than ever
but that's not something I should surrender to

what surprises me most out of all of this:
how I said the words so carelessly,
how scary it must've sounded to you,
and how childish it sounded to me