Halfwife Poem by Katrina Harms

Halfwife

Unfinished business
The only thing keeping me
From slitting my wrists
I had a life once
I saw it on the edge of where
The treeline meets the skyline
I had a dream I
Could have it all,
You and I
And me and me
But honestly
I can't dwell any longer in half life
Half awake taking and staking out
Half dreams and seeing life passing by
Rationing my passions
Under my pillow like a child‘s crime
I‘m biding time, deciding if I‘m
Worthy enough to spur me to life,
I‘m
Sweeping the kitchen,
I'm clocking in clocking out
Tapping in tapping out between
Half woman and
Half wife
How long will I last in this half life
Waiting and wishing and dreading and fading and aging and sighing for the
Me
The me I once wanted to be
The dreams I once followed unfailingly
Before the fall,
the slow and easy quiet fall
Of it‘s easier this way, I‘ll do it
I am strong enough for two
It's fine, I‘ll do it.
I‘ll be everything you need
Everything but me, I‘ll do it
There's nothing to it
And nothing left to live on
Nothing but this halfwife
Half child
Clawing out of her skin to get wild
And free
To finally
Finish what I started, wholeheartedly
Wake up to the
Woman
Who was
Once me