Heroes And Crooks Poem by Andrus Cassian

Late night, suffering through another moody late night
the topic on my mind tonight, irrelevant but appropriate
originating in the contents of a song because of this Yellowcard
I'm feeling another sure thing falling and as those lyrics graced my ears
burying the cryptic meaning I once thought into a different perspective
Why...why...oh, why
why on these nights do I let music change, change me
turn me back to neutral, reflecting on my previous activities
reflecting about myself, the hero I've built myself up to be
Now I'm up late writing hooks
to describe all of these sorrow filled looks
I endure and take in; the ones I pin
All of these books, I've read about heroes and crooks
and to my wonderment now, I'm trying to find out how...
how...myself...am I, am I a crook
I forbid it, I deny it, I regret it if I went that route
I'm dead set on being a hero
a modern day Spiderman just without the web
a modern day Ironman just without the bionic suit
save as many people as I possibly can
whether they need a shoulder to cry on, advice for a personal problem
some entertainment, a cure for boredom, a lullaby
anything, anything they could possibly need
just try and lend a helping hand, do the best I can
free of charge, nothing in return
Please don't tell me I'm something less
please don't tell me I'm something else
Even though I feel like a cheater, crook, criminal
I still strive to be a hero: tall, golden, significant
but I'm still falling behind on the simplest tasks
it's like I'm in a steel wake behind an electric fence
My thoughts have painted that calculated portrait
A hero
I know I belong in the image, in the scenary
in the cold, calming effect of an eclipsing stone statue
in honor of me
the trophy room filled with my accomplishments
but for now, I'm satisfied with being a zero
full of anger, of love, of fight, no hate
an ambush of failure circulating my aura
Crook; I've tried not to become one
not to succumb, not to be undone
a martyr to myself
an image to excel, an image of inspiration
an obstacle to overcome
Life...life is the obstacle to overcome