I Envy That Girl Poem by kristina joyner joyner

I envy that girl

when
when will I stop
when will I care
when will I not care
when will head match my heart
when can I cry
when can show the way I really feel
when can I watch
I cant watch
when will my watery eyes finally cry
is it safe to cry?
I rushed out
I moved to fast
Intead of healing
I rushed out!
I moved to fast!
No I refuse
He rushed out!
He moved to fast!
Will I really let got
Why cat I really let go?
I don't wanna lie
I don't wanna cry
But my eyes!
They burn
My chest still burns!
I cant breath!
And When I speak my words sound dry!
When I see him
When he comes here
My lungs fill with everything I need to cry
My shame
My pain
My hate!
But my eyes remain dry
Am I bitter now?
Is that what ive become? !
No I still love
Ill still love
I just envy that girl
For what she has
For what she took
I might have rushed out
I might have moved too fast
It might be too soon
But I refuse to let that man see me
In the way I am
See the way the fire and ice
creep in and out
the way my heart freezes over
and burns for him every day
I wont say what want
I cant say what I want
Im fine
But I envy that girl
For what she has
for what she took