I Want To Ask God.... Poem by Mrinalini Ray

I want to ask,
hard questions tonight,
For i seek answers,
that are true and right

I do not care about the devil
I long to face the divine, the pure, the final
I want to stare eye to eye, ask, why were
the turns so cruel, the cuts so deep, the blows so fatal,

What? What wrong i did?
Why? Why Were you so livid?


You wanted to crush me, fine! But, why
did you choose to relish in my dissolution?
Why did you want me to hope, to dream? You
should've warned, that rules allowed for deception

You never played it fair, at every corner
you used tricks and charms to hoodwink,
while i marveled at prospects, you bid time
to strike, to finish, to make me sink...

...so deep that even i can't locate myself, now

What? What could those games have meant?
Why? Why did you not take my consent?



Tell me, was i wrong
to chance my fate?
to believe in myself? to see
the dream less dreamt

Tell me, why did you hid
from me, the writing on the wall?
Why did you curse, that
every jump of mine will result in a fall?

Tell me, Why did you destine my hope
to be shattered like glasses?
Why did you fate my desire
to be reduced to ashes?

Tell me. Why this silence?
So suffocating is this ambience!



Why don't you answer, damn it? Or has
my sorrow, the result of your deeds, numbed you?
Then, imagine, what i go through when
it boils inside me daily, this sorrow, your gift to a chosen few.

Why? Why was i your choice?


Please answer, I want to hear that voice

...that devilish, that sadist, that coarse voice of yours
that which can spell only doom, prophesy only darkness

Give me that darkness,
if you have more to give to me,
i wanna take a plunge into it.
I wanna see how dark can it be.