Judgment Poem by Miles Millikan

Through the years of adolescence there is enough of an affliction in our lives from our superiors of stress and expectations
Judgments is the last thing we need
He is ashamed to look at his own reflection
Feeling ashamed was created for those who committed a crime, but this innocent boy has done nothing at all
Society has implanted the notion that he has committed some offense
And this horrid opinion has been nesting inside his head for so long, that it has emerged from its cocoon as a fact
Afraid to look in the mirror constantly wishing he was something, someone, different
Other children have fantasies of luxury and magical far off lands and paradise, but we are stuck with the fantasies of being another, trading lives with someone who is surrounded by the respect and courtesy from others
But we dream to be the same people who pull us down in the first place
They are the ones to tear the tears from our eyes at night, their “jokes” about our insecurities rest in our heads for days on end until they crawl into our eyes and poison our vision to see a creature that is not us
We see what they have described, they are the storytellers and we are just the character that they manipulate for their entertainment
And we just wish we could start over, be different, and look different
As he walks down the hall he is awarded with compliments
His response a polite thank you, but his mind now fiercely at war
An infant not knowing which is their parent, having to guess which is right hoping it won’t kill them because of it
He begins to make excuses; his own mind fights against him
“They’re lying, softening the truth. They know you can’t handle it”
He begins to examine the question of what is even positive in him
Finding the most miniscule darkness in the brightest lighthouse within himself
His mirror has become his worst enemy
The image he sees is no longer even close to his appearance, for he does not see his appearance any more, but what he believes is there
He tries to fight this demon, but it is only himself he damages
He claws at his face, pulling at the acne on his skin, just wishing it would fall off and heal over, but it doesn’t
Blood falls. Tears form. The insults grow louder. Louder. Louder and then silence
His hands bracing himself on the sink, head held low, sobbing and gasping for air, he looks up at what he has become
He started so beautiful, so pure and unique
But it was too much; he had convinced himself he was hideous, grotesque
He had to match the abominable thoughts in his head with his appearance
And he finally achieved this.
The mind is a destructive weapon
No matter who we are, all humans judge others in a matter of seconds on how they hold themselves up, with and abundance of pride or with fear
But how can we hold ourselves up when the discourtesy and disrespect of others is pounding on our backs
Humans sometimes forget that we are all humans, on the inside