! Just Another Rant Poem by Michael Shepherd

There are things which we all know
but pretend we don’t
as we watch them with amusement wriggling publicly
out of their public bonds..

1) You can always buy your way
to ‘honours’ – but not, ha, to ‘honour’:
not with a cheque by return of post, of course;
just by more subtle ‘charity’ of the sort
which inevitably involves
large sums of money gratefully received
by the genuinely honourable. But of course
you'll be the only one who confuses
honours with honour.

2) The buck – with honourable exceptions –
never ‘stops here’ – it stops
at the guy one below ‘here’:
you’re in charge – so, you don ‘t say
‘Go kill Thomas á Becket’ etc.. you say
‘Who will rid me of this turbulent priest? ’ into the air,
kinda rhetorical question.. and, surprise,
there’s a scrum of posse at the gun cabinet..

3) There are certain countries and no I won’t
where bribes – often to those who don’t need them –
are like thank-you letters – you don’t have to,
but everyone expects it… and don’t be surprised
if you’re off their seasonal greetings card list next year..

just one suggestion: that if blackmailed trade-wise
by a foreign country to break your own code of honour
and you stand up and say ‘It would not be
in Britain’s interest in terms of
commercial and diplomatic good relations
and employment in skilled industry
to pursue this matter through the courts’
you should have your British passport and nationality
taken away; after all, you’ve already forfeited it
in the court of honour..

OK that feels better. How was it for you?