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Much Longer?

I just can't continue much more
Minute by minute just a painful chore.
Groans of unhappiness as I walk out the door
Each distance I travel, aching and sore.

My sad soulless windows won't let people in
A smileless reflection with not even a grin.
Supposed to take it all, take it all on the chin
They think this, my friends, and next of kin.

I take a scarf to hide, at least a piece of me
To hide the fact I hate myself and that I feel no glee
No point in explaining, coz they just don’t see
From myself and this life I feel I’d like to flee.

My eyes, I see, they look me up and down
I’m the king with not a penny, not even his crown.
Others laugh freely yet I dare not frown.
I’m a fool, you see, yes, I’m a clown.

I’m good at what I do in feeling oh so bad
I’m also friends with loneliness that’s why I feel so sad
Anger likes me too, well maybe just a tad
Please don’t ask me how I am as it only makes me mad.

My being here means nothing as I barely do exist
A touch has lost its meaning, as well as to be kissed
There’s nothing you can do, so please do not insist
You see, I’m an open wound, a germ-infested cyst.

I’m going to be this way coz I’m never quite content
I know just how to spoil, to damage, to mark and of course to dent
Heaven or hell I don’t care, wherever I get sent
Just as long as I’m gone, this world can go get bent.

Submitted: Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Edited: Sunday, February 13, 2011

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