'My Dear Mother' Poem by Pushpinder Kaur

My Dear Mother

During my morning walk today
My ears searched for your voice in the rustling of the leaves,
In the soothingly blowing morning breeze
In the shimmering rainbow circle of the clouds
Around the moon on the full moon night,
In the soft ripples in the waters of the Creek-
Everything that's beautiful, pure and delightful
Seems a possible abode for you.

As I try to search for you
My heart cannot believe that you have gone
Unto the 'Folds of God' as they say-
Really? I was myself witness to you
Breathing your last
And much before that, I knew you were
In some other world, different from where we breathed in-
When you refused to open your eyes, and your ears refused to hear-
I knew you were not among us anymore
Yet the weeping heart refuses to be convinced,
My crying eyes seem to have an unspoken hope!

Are you now liberated, freed from the shackles that
Kept you tied to limited horizon of action?
Where are you? Are you everywhere?
Are you even here with me, in my house?
Earlier you were of one place physically-
But as they say that once the body dies
The spirit is liberated,
The soul freed-
So perhaps you can zoom across all barriers
Of place, distance and time-
Thus watching over us all sitting in different directions!

Are you amongst the distant stars? Have you become a star?
Are you with the angels? Where are these angels?
Are you in Heaven?
Where is this heaven Mother?
How will I ever know these answers?
No one has ever found these answers
So I am no different-
They say, 'time is a great healer',
There are two kinds of people- the living and the dead-
And the two belong to different worlds
Without any meeting point!

Perhaps you may be able to meet your own
Mother and father!
Your very own- most beloved, youngest Brother?
So many Uncles and Aunts?
And all those you had known!
There must be a new world up there-

Oh, so you shall not be alone
But certainly our Father sits alone-
Breathing your absence
Though as brave as ever he has been-
Yet I know his emptiness, which may be worse than mine.

Life seems so cruel Mother-
Every relationship so inadequate
Nothing but an air bubble-
Today we are and tomorrow not-
What is Not…
Is Not!
And must be forgotten with time and
Not allowed to grapple with 'normal life'!
The 'mourning' is not supposed to last forever- they say;
What was perhaps the most important core of life,
Now gone, is advised, to be slowly forgotten!

This cruel life must go on-
Eat we must, drink we must
Live we must for those living around us-
For we are of one world
As you are of another!


Beloved Mother: In your dedicated memory from your daughter

Mrs. Pushpinder Kaur 13.12.2015