Prior to leaving to the petty pantry
I had the radio to “The Perfect Fool”
With a lollapalooza comedy guest
Tonight I plan to have me a cat’s meow
Going to take out my snuggle pup
To experience the silver screen
For the first time this year
Will be driving her in my used Packard
Which uses ethyl that I’ve purchased?
From a neighbor and a pal assisted him
In restoring the twin six
I have to get a wiggle on; I don’t want to be late
Don’t want my snuggle pup head out with another fella
A big night I’ve planned
Will ask her to be insured to me
Had purchased me handcuffs from the local jeweler's
The orchid cost me limbs
Have a choice of films
“The General” with Buster Keaton
And Lon Chaney’s “The Unknown”
Until on the radio before learning
They mentioned an amazing pianoist
Would be on the ivories
During the showing of a new film
From a few good pals
Most likely he’ll be sporting his soup-and-fish
Looking like a sugar daddy
Most likely that gold-digger
Will be present wooing the pianist with her Juliet
Possibly a headache band upon it
I’m old enough this year
So my snuggle pup and I would be without
A fire extinguisher present
To keep me from an eel’s hip
I head to the parlor and snatch up
My best plus fours and best shirt
That I purchased for big events like this
I change out of my oxford bags
And into the special clothes
This evening I’ll be putting on the ritz
Hopefully tonight will not be like
A week before
When this swanky lounge lizard
Tried to play me
Attempting to have me suck the bamboo
When I refused
I took a couple saps
To the kiester from him
I had cast a kitten
When the cops believed his line
They didn’t let me mooch there for five chimes
They thought I was off my nuts
Either thinking I was a sad sap
Who slipped and fell upon my kiester
Or I was fried to the hat
Because an iota of hooch could be sniffed
Yet only had two hair of the dogs
At the local barrelhouse
Before we arrived a block away
Couple of fellas looking like junk peddlers
Assuming I am a hot fiend
Attempting to sell me some hop
Yet I kept ankling with my snuggle pup
Acknowledging they were a couple of fly dicks
At the ticket booth a ritzy dapper rush the lady clerk
After him, a trio of chunks of led
Passing by a few bell bottoms
Once in a group of lolly gaggers in front
They always slay me
On my left in back
Is where the smoke eaters congregate
A few frosh, center left
The one with the cheaters looked ossified
A group of smarties to my right
In the back, couple of them seemed too risqué
At the time
Those keen flappers call themselves “Gnat’s Whistles”
A few others I see are not present at the time
They all wear their hair in bobs
Like the dutchboy, eton crop and shingled bob
I can tell they don on rayon stockings
It’s early yet
But with the ivories performances
They come on like gangbusters
Will anticipate a jam-packed cinematic house
Those bell bottoms I noticed
Have entered
Then I noticed that goldigger is here now
Located closest to the pianist and his ivories
Then the trio of hot sketches shows up in the center
Eventually the seats are cumulated
With movie goers
The theatre goes dark
Then the silver screen of the year begins
This poem has not been translated into any other language yet.
I would like to translate this poem
pianist? :) oh, you got it the 2nd time! After him, a trio of chunks of led.......or lead? i really am not sure, as i'm not hip to all the 20's slang! i had bell bottoms in the 70s. were they 'pants' also in the 20s? ? i just read One Summer...America,1927, but it did not have much slang in it. it deals with many newsworthy, though not always worthy activities of the 1920s. thanks. bri :) aka Brian