Reminiscences Of A Fan Blade Poem by Ayokunle Adeleye

She was the one for love of whom
I had left my mother's womb;
I saw her as the angel perching
That my soul may stop searching

And thinking that she was ready
To give love that was steady
For her I did yearn;
I couldn't have known she'd spurn

Thought I was desirable enough
And was expectant
Like others before me I got a rebuff -
She is unrepentant

Thanks to desiring her
I'm now a foe to many
On my reputation she's cast a mar
And I'm worth less than a penny

Yet while retreat was in season
My brain rightfully felt she'd boo
But to it I did not listen -
My heart argued we'd make a perfect two

And I should have taken my cue
When investments were still few
'You are NOT my type, ' she'd said
And lachrymose I'd gone to bed

Then should I have withdrawn
Like the touched tentacles of a snail
If loose from her I had torn
I'd not be muttering this wail

And 'tis now that I feel the after-pain
That I think about it all:
It was all in vain;
My being kicked around like a ball

So that dejected I've been made
And rejected I feel
But the memory of her won't fade
So that I may heal

Guess my love is harmful after all
Since my sheepishness I now appall
And this question I continually ponder:
'Of how many hearts has she made a plunder? '

For now there's a guy
About whom she's mad
Since their knot I must not untie
I can only feel bad

Yet, her I was coming for
About her I was crazy heretofore
But now she desires another
Should I still bother?