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(April 5/1945 / Sydney, Nova Scotia)

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! ! ! ! ! ! Restless Soul

Restless Soul

I’m but a beggar now…….
lying in filth of torment and hate……
scorned ……beaten……drained……...
closed the door to my endless schemes..
Lashed…. until my blood ran dry
Tore my heart out as I beconed to the sky…..
Help father…. where are you……
did you not cover me with the blood of the lamb,
long, long ago…I remember when….
you loved me then…..
I’m red…… with the stench of my own blood
you hear me not as I scream in pain,
Too late….Too late…. too late….
I’m tossed, to the caves of inhumanity
It is Fear that sleeps within my heart…..
dieing a death….. a meaningless death,
where are my friends
those whom I followed in the past
So low, the dredge of societies class
I fear…evil… has turned it’s face and it is
I, present in the gallows of disgrace
I fear thee now and forever more,
Walking not…. on your heavenly shore
I’m calling on you now Father…..
You…. of deafened ear…. for I
was not the daughter of good and purity,
no…not what you wanted to see…I was me
holding my head in the depth of darkness,
too long….too loooong playing with the burning flames
Placed my feet on sinking sand…… no longer
thought of holding your hand….laughing… yes
pitiful… demonic….celebrating with the beasts,
walking in darkness….. all good ceased,
Fat with the wrongs held within….. blinded
of good holding evil with pride…..
piercing my veins…..dieing inside
I died a death a long time ago, lived on the sweat
of empty minds….. stealing from the
weak…. deceiving the strong…. winning my
fight most of the time… I preyed on the young….
the naivety of youth and murdered the solace
of the aged. Doth fear hold me as I ponder
death….. doth walking to the alter bring me
down to my knees….. No….. I think not as I walk
the corridors of an endless hallway….. day nor
night does not exist here….. nameless…. in agony
forevermore….. Suspended in a realm of
infinite terror….. wishing and hoping for the
end to come forth…. screaming… begging for that final
score. Oh no..…make no mistake…I’ll not walk on
your shore. I shall die alone with no one’s love…..
covered with the coal and coke of soured mines…..
I’m but nothing…a mere shell of a woman……
Yes it’s true…..I died a long…long…. time ago……

Written by: Melvina Germain
Date: Feb.12/2009

Submitted: Friday, February 13, 2009
Edited: Thursday, February 19, 2009


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