So Attractive Yet So Unavailable Poem by Thabani Khumalo

There is still another oddity
that startles my wits halfway into the grave;
I am so attractive and yet so unavailable
to all the colorful beauties of planet earth,

I speak in euphemisms and grieve bitterly over fallen nations,
over starving children and the welfare of a peaceful future,
I pray for the souls that long perished in vain
to rise again and once more fulfill their mission. I'd rather look at every ugly thing I see upon the land
than look directly at your beautiful face -
you are a woman so I know you will be waiting for the glance,
I fear that we may meet in a glimpse and see eye to eye
and you catch the secrets I always succeed at hiding.
I don't want you to know that deep inside I do care
but out here I cannot make it a physical virtue.
The games of the night do not fit the description of a feeling of birth.
That is the thing I've been told is love.