That's How It Is To Grow Old Poem by Buddy Bee Anthony

My face has more wrinkles than Johnny Unitas.
My body, war-torn from osteo-arthritis
I'm no longer multi-orgasmic,
when I'm aroused
it's far from fantastic
Women seem colder
My life's in a manila folder
My skin's pock-marked brown as molass

I'm neither bolder, nor wiser
with no fortune to miser
I'm up over 60 plus tax.
In a pinch, I possess little to flaunt.
I get senior discounts
but, that's not what I want

Wild hairs have grown thick
in my ears and my nose
Phlegm flows freely
from out of my pie hole.
I snort when I wheeze
Doc
more pain killers, please,
That's how it is to grow old

If I could grow younger
there'd be a bounce to my step
I'd break dance at parties
be nobody's schlep
Blue ribbons and bow ties
your number one rep
If I could grow young
and not old
I'd take a brisk walk
I'd go long
I'd be stoked
Folks wouldn't say
'hey Gramps
where are you going'?
I wouldn't fumble around
in some hospital gown
sporting butt cheeks of cheese
to be showing

I beg mercy Lord please
bring me back home
Sidestepping the smells
blast whistle alarms

their mind numbing bells
The incessant coughing
sneezing
nose blowing
and wheezing.
The telephone's ringing
The charge nurse keeps singing
But, none of my family's showing

Up or down soon my soul will be flying
I know all about death
You see, my friends are all dying
Still, the world keeps on turning
while my stomach is churning.
Am I some unholy relic
who's terminally unique?
What of these youth
with fake smiles
trudging through
road weary miles
I've too often remained silent
When I should speak

Since I'm older now
and paying less taxes
Compound my interest
with principle
if it'll awaken the masses.
With tap dancing moves
still in my step
My time isn't up
I've still got some pep.
I'm a groovy old shrew
with a surprise left or two
So consider giving me
half of a chance
My only dilemma
are these delusions of grandeur
and these delusions
keep shitting their pants.
I'm not quite dead yet
nor ready to fold
that's how it is
to grow old.

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Buddy Bee Anthony