The Christmas Gift Poem by David Wood

Thank you for your present aunt Jane dear,
Three bars of soap, so thoughtful, coloured blue,
The same brand that you bought me last year
They now take pride of place, in the loo.

And for your gift too dear uncle Brice,
One bottle of aftershave with ‘two for one'
Marked on the packet, makes my beard smell nice
It's the same present you bought your son.

And thank you sister Jo, so kind, so meek,
For the lovely red woolen jumper you got,
The same one I took to the charity shop last week
That wasn't difficult for me to spot.

And grandma, thank you for the socks too,
There is nothing wrong with them being pink
I can see that they are nearly new
Dyed at least twice, I think.

And granddad, the cheque was a nice thought
And for so much, I nearly had a fit
But the bank rejected it and I was distraught
Because when I looked closer, you hadn't signed it.

It's not about the gift but about the giving,
Christmas presents are for those you hold dear,
When you consider the high cost of living.
But wait and see what I'll get you all, next year!