The Great Purple (Ersatz) Limericks Poem by Sophia White

(this is a terrible poem, and sickeningly facetious. I wrote it several yeas ago.)


There once was a word known as “purple”
Which everyone claimed rhymed with “rubber”
But this, as you know,
Just isn’t so
So “violet”soon replaced “purple”.

Some people just cannot get
Why we must say “Violet”
But purple is gone,
Rejected and done
‘Cause rubber would not rhyme with it.

So when you are ancient and hunched
If you talk to the youngsters too much
And out of your lips
The word purple slips
The youngsters will all think you’re touched.

If you hobble to the library
And pick up a new dictionary
No matter how you flip
And gnaw on your lip
The word purple it just will not carry.

You might even call up the President
Who’ll say, “To me it’s quite evident
That your missing word
Is very absurd
I’ve heard no language having it! ”

I’m sorry to tell youm my friends,
That all things must come to an end.
But don’t insist rubber
Must rhyme with purple
‘Cause it sure as peas throws off my limericks!