Thoughts/Thinking Poem by Jennifer Ortiz

I can't stnad my thoughts anymore.
I want to be normal like everyone else.
I am tied of being fat and 'special'
Getting told you can't do something because you are to big
HURTS.
So you just bottle it in,
Without even noticing your cup is full.
You want to tell someone but you can't,
because your afride of what they might think about you.
It feels like you can't handle it anymore.
Your thoughts run throu your mind as fast as a lightning bolt.
You can only catch every other thought.
All you heard is,
'would people miss me if I was gone? '
'Would people even notice? '
You sit here thinking those thoughts wondering how life can even contiune.
All the names, comments and pranks they play on you
Thinking, 'oh, this is fun'.
If they could only see what that is doing to that person.
That person puts a mask on to cover up the pain,
so then people can't see it.
When they finally see what they are causing, its to late.
They are gone, they have already died.
I am dead inside, I can't feel anything anymore.
Wishing I had someone that I could talk to but I can't.
I am stuk in nutral and can't get out.
All the things people say and diffrent things that hurts.
No matter what you do to cover it up,
it will soon hit you like a brick wall
and it is harder that you may think.
If only I had a friend at this stupid school maybe it would be diffrent.
But it dont.
I just keep getting hit in the face over and over again.
But yet I keep going back for more,
thinking that maybe someone will stick up for me. But that never do.