You Shall Not Come In The Fall……. Poem by Eva Clara Harahap

If you shall be reading this somewhere in time
You shall penetrate to my soul..
You shall dive into my heart…
You shall, you shall, you shall…
Mistaken me NOT with someone else….

I am different…
I am solitude complete…
I am not the messenger…
I am the MESSAGE…

Shall you belittle me…
Shall you not listen to me…
Shall you ignore me…
I will always be walking…
NOT in someone else’s path…
But on my own path, my silken beaded road….

Did you see not?
You grave me with your wish..
Burry me in a fictional life…
Oh, my funeral day will arrive…
But, I see you are still convincing life…

Still, I cast away…
As I never listen to me…
Swallowing my own doubts in a lullaby..
Then, you came by and hook me in a ride…

Still, I talk to you…
With my eyes closed…
With a mute heart..
With a deaf soul….
And a dead spirit..

Oh You, If I shall not meet you…
Then, life will be full of white blooming jasmine…
Laughing daffodils will kiss my soul….
I shall laugh with them, dance with them…
I shall not craft my own grave…
With word from a mysterious soul….

But, memory are an echo in disguise..
It only needs a dark hollow room to reappear…
Reappear to torture me…
Haunting me, taunting me…
Destroy me, trapping me….

Shall I talk decent now?
As your voice is as soft as an angel voice..
Luring me from reality…
Escaping me from me…
I dare not say…
I am the soul mistakenly understood….

Oh dear me, my life is wasted…
Down on the knee of all majorities..
Oh life, oh life, take me now…
As I no longer can live…
As I no longer can breathe…

I left with nothing…
As I am nothing…
You, you laugh with the charming wind…
You, you dance with a handsome storm…

I am here, holding nothing but a rotten root…
Playing sadly with the crying valley…
Holding tears as the mountain dew…
As it roughly took me away…
A way into the dark of a foreign thunder…

I am in the dark now…
Life betrays my trust…
Hope destroys my wish…
Angels, oh they came to rest…
Once they saw me…

I talk again to you…
Asking for hope to return home…
Asking for kindness to appear…

But All you did, All you did…
Was taking me to the dark hollow room…
Where echo sit there…
Smiling with a glee….

As now I lay breathless..
You shall not come in the fall…
The fall of my time in the sun…
Still you come to enchant my nightmare…
Still you speak the truth of how my life should be…

You are..
Looking innocently at my disgrace…
Happy, you can lure me from my traits..
Smiling with victory to this witty fool…

You know where I will go….
As a punishment of neglecting my triumph…
To the other dark and empty place…
I can no longer asking for more time to be me…
I have wasted my life…
You go to other life, luring them, destroying them…

BUT, this time..
I will not give you a chance…
As now you are holding my message…
So does the other and the thousands others and the millions others…

Still, I lay here breathlessly…
But my message is immortal….
As I AM IMMORTAL…
In the spirit that echoes endlessly…
Through all tunnels of time…

A reminder to every soul..
To not waste time to be somebody else….
To not give up on you’re destine life….
To live a life of your dream…
Or Regret will come with you in the fall….

Copyright © Eva Clara Harahap May 2009