20/20 Poem by Persephone Springs

I have spent the past 2 weeks being selfish
Selfishly hating her
Selfishly wanting you
Selfishly pitying me
Selfish, selfish, selfish, selfish, selfish
Some people believe that, if you say a word enough times, it loses its meaning
But no matter how many times I say it, I cannot seem to forget the incredible weight of this one word
Selfish
I cannot forget the look of unmistakable brokenness he wore when I chose you
I cannot forget how much time I spent as your shadow
I cannot forget that I was so hopelessly in love with you
So in love that I forgot him
So in love that I ignored him
He always made time for me
He always would smile at me in the halls; tell me I was beautiful
Making awkward declarations of love, forever unrequited
I broke it
Broke everything for you
Broke his heart
Betrayed mine
And now that I have finally realized that I was lucky
Lucky to even have him look at me in the first place
He has finally realized that his life would be better if he stopped looking at me now
So here I am
Writing Hiding under my permanent cloak of invisibility
Selfish
Hoping I can get him back
Hoping he'll take me back
'Selfish'- The gray area between love and morals