Margaret Kollmer Poems

James Clarke, the funniest columnist in South Africa, hosts a special place in his column for 'pomes' as against poems. He says pomes are awful verses but he can't stop his readers from 'unindating' his column with them.

One of James' loyal readers, Barry, wrote to him suggesting that James find a 'pote laureate', i.e. the writer of the very worst pome. When James advertised this fact in his column, he spelled 'laureate' 'loreate' in keeping with the spelling of 'pome' as against poem.
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I picked this up from cousins in Tralee when I was there. Useful to raise a laugh: -)

Slainté do na bfhear is go mara na mná go deo.
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Darling Grandson and fellow Aquarian! Just a little note before I go, so to squeak …….

Life for us Aquarians can be a little tough. It shouldn’t be but, as we know, we sort of make things a little tougher for ourselves than we should just because of who we are, which makes some people (family mostly) think we are a breed apart.They consider they are the norm and we are aliens, but who’s to say that is so?
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I’m wanting to say things
but they come out in rhyme-
It’s hard to write ‘straightly’
Blame it Ed, on my prime.
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(Taken from the Old Phorum circa 1998)


Liberated from all desire to be liberated
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(John London’s Radio Talk Show when he was
accidentally locked in the toilet)
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In Mexico they're rude and call us names
They will not let us join Olympic games
They think they've got us by the neck
but do we worry wot the heck
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Get out of the house, they said, they said
Get out of the house … take up bowls.
So fratefully social, they said, they said
There’s no finer game than bowls.
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SHE: I find you make me ill at ease
Your temper is explosive;
You’re gruff and rude and frankly
Your sarcasm is corrosive.
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