Apologies Poem by philip mtange

For crying out loud
For my selfish demands
The pain of my birth
And the turmoil of my upbringing
Accept my apologies.

For the insults thrown at you
For the lack of feeling and compassion
The disrespect
And the sarcasm that accompanies youth
Accept my apologies.

For the years of yearning for freedom
Relentless break of solitude and loneliness
And repeated bouts of selfishness
For long faces
And empty laughs
Accept my apologies.

For the love so freely given
And not appreciated
For the love which is now bought
With pieces of gold and silver
For praises heaped generously
Which are now cajoled with jewellery
Accept my apologies.


For company endured with pain
For fits of anger and uncontrolled rage
And concealed love
For Wanton misery and poverty
Accept my apologies.

For quality time mismanaged
For yeaning to shower you
With hugs and kisses
For the pain of absence
And the desolate reality of life
Accept my apologies.

For the wish to relive my past
And recreate and rekindle memories
To ride the black stallion
And the hopeless reminder
Of the life of a beggar.

For the fears of adulthood
And realities of growing up
Alone
For the lack of reassuring words
And the calming of demons
For standing resolute
Uncowed, unperturbed.



For the years gone
And the years come
For the miracle of a grandchild's birth
Forever missed
And blessing forever forfeited
…………………………… mama.