At Hiroshima's Rock Poem by Dillon Crawford

At Hiroshima's Rock

Rating: 4.8


I had to do a project on Hiroshima for school and I came across a poem about helping the victims at Hiroshima. That one poem inspired me to go and write this about a victim of Hiroshima.
P.S. For those of you who don't know the Enola gay was the plane that bombed Hiroshima

In solitude I walk
Down at Hiroshima’s rock
With the wind at my back
The sky itself was jet black
As I walk
At Hiroshima’s rock
I, the white soldier

Down at Hiroshima’s rock I watch
Waiting on the world
Something will occur
For if nothing were to happen
The world would just arrest
As I walk
At Hiroshima’s rock
I, the white soldier

I hope for the best
But hoping has done nothing
It has killed my friends
It has destroyed my country
As I walk
At Hiroshima’s rock
I, the white soldier

I knew the war was on
All our support had been withdrawn
Peace was on the way
This could well be the last day
We all just want this to be over
As I walk
At Hiroshima’s rock
I, the white soldier

I saw in the distance
The gray Enola gay
I knew right then
The war wasn’t over
As I was running to the ground
I saw little boy fall from the sky
I saw a huge flash of light
Then, I saw no more
As I walked
At Hiroshima’s rock
I, the dead soldier

COMMENTS OF THE POEM
Carl Harris 05 April 2009

This is not a bad poem, Dillon, but it could use some polishing. I liked your use of reptition of certain words and phrases, but It's a bit too over done. Three times would be about the max for a poem of this length. From the way this poem flows and reads, I would guess that your were still a teen when you wrote it, simply because it shows. Your last verse was the best in the poem, but dead folks don't walk. It would be better to say 'lying there by Hiroshima Rock, ' or 'Killed there by Hiroshima Rock.' Still I liked the concept of this poem and it's theme and think you have great poetic promise. Carl.

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Joseph Poewhit 30 May 2008

They use to throw rocks at each other one time

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